Merigolds attract gorillas, interlude 

Doesn’t matter what you plant in your garden. If a gorilla sits on it, it’s squash. 

But when I want squash, and I wanna attract gorillas, I plant marigolds next to my crop.

–from an ad for Great Ape brand fertilizer soil specified for squash blend, ca. 1930.

Remember to do this, interlude 

Dear Mom,

Please remember to preheat the oven for 20 minutes at 350 degrees Fahrenheit before putting in the pork chops.

Remember to place a pieces of parchment paper on cookie sheets.

Remember to put an equal amount of brown mustard and mayonnaise in a bowl. 

Remember to smoother a small amount of the brown mustard/mayonnaise mixture on each pork chop before coating it in the breading. 

— from an ad in Pork Chops & Choppers Monthly, June 1997