Veggie Horror Films, interlude

They call him Skin-Face. He watched his whole family peel and eat their neighbors and now wears their remains. You will know him when you see him.

He goes around with a massive vegetable peeler, seeking all young spuds with rotten intentions. Only one with a good heart can oppose him. Can you spend one night alive in the Peeler House?

From “Night Fright-Veggie Nightmare,” directed by Vance Peeler-Frufflefluff, who also directed “Xastiron of the Skillet Massacre, in 3D.”

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Not interested in humans, interlude

That’s just a roaming spider. There’s nothing to be afraid of. He’s looking for something to eat and you’re not small enough.

-from “Let out Charlie,” sci-fi live theatre show about a detective who solves crimes by studying spiders, especially a specific species of spider that scavenges off dead bodies.

City Life. Interlude

A life full of danger, full of monsters, where you don’t know if you’re gonna make it home; and when you do, you thank your lucky stars, or the newest hero who just happened to find you in trouble, that you survived another day; that’s life in the city.

From an advertisement in “Fortune Spoonerism Magazine,” August 1985 issue.

Pumpkin Cheesecake, interlude

Pumpkin Pie got angry

and turned into a monstrosity

twice its normal size

and put on armor

made from brown sugar,

butter and walnuts.

Toothbrush, interlude

The old toothbrush sat on his throne and contemplated what to do. He sat in his lofty castle with its dark halls and brooded over the sounds his troops made.

Screams of terror could be heard from far away. Looming footsteps shook the ground; followed by a sound not of this earth. Steal bent back in loud complaint.

“The east towers have fallen, sire,” said the aid.

“Form ranks,” said the toothbrush, “Let every man who can fight prove himself.”

Messengers were sent to relay the last orders of the old toothbrush. He chose to go out fighting. The three months that had been declared the law of the land for each toothbrush to reign, and then give up the throne, had gone. It was now the sixth month and a new toothbrush had yet to show. 

“Send the order for every man for himself,” said the old toothbrush, “We will not let our kingdom go into decay.”

They were empty words. The old toothbrush knew his abilities were lax. Were it not for floss and mouthwash the kingdom would be lost. There had to be hope. The dental appointment would arrive soon and with it a new toothbrush. 

–From the book of short stories, “I Am Lettuce, Who Are You?”

Excerpt from the short story, “When Medieval Fantasy Meets Modern Dentistry” by Hudson Jamison Toaster-Tabby, submitted June, 1983. Arthur T. Pearl-Lion Publishers, inc, Topeka, KS.

Going Blank, interlude

My mom, who runs Rubiescorner.wordpress.com, is always on her blog. She has 1000 plus followers and the blog is her pride and joy.

As of today she cannot write a new post. The screen turns white and not even reloading can fix it. She says it started when she clicked on an update.

The research says it’s a plug-in problem, but it’s a free account which has no serious plugins.

I’m writing on my account and don’t have the problem. I don’t have 1000 plus followers either.

Here’s to hoping this will get ironed out. Here’s to waiting and seeing if things will be better tomorrow.

Anyhow, I’m writing because I cannot get sleep or peace if rubiescorner’s blog is batty. Please help.

From Sleepy Nightowl Jenkins McKenzie, November 16, 2018, in an email to WordPress administrators.

Rainy Wednesday, interlude

I’ve had a cold since at least Saturday, starting with a frog in my throat, and have been fighting the symptoms with vitamin C.

A slice of lemon and honey in green tea have been my constant friends, when I can remember them.

Yesterday was my last day to volunteer for the Tennessee Republican Party. I had a cold, but chose to go anyway.

At the store I bought a non-drowsy cold medicine, but still had to deal with brain fog.

The day went by rather fast with little problem, other than my bladder giving me a hard time.

Bladder has been intimate friends with my nerves since I started volunteering back in September.

The young man who is more or less in charge of volunteers will go back to his home in Colorado on Thursday, since Midterms are over.

I was supposed to help by phone banking until California until 11 p.m. e.s.t. but it didn’t happen.

—from an interview with Ctfarc Isaacson on November 7, 2018.