Mother’s Day Cake, interlude

..There was at least one other candidate, and it was a difficult decision to make, but instead we chose…the Pineapple Layer Cake for our dessert.

–from the reality show “No Rest-aurant in a Dessert Oasis, Mother’s Day Edition” the show that follows customers in restaurants and giving them various choices for dessert.

Ca. May, 2003

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Early Mother’s Day

..you may have seen something like this..

..But that isn’t what’s being served for church after service tomorrow, provided I can get up early enough.

..I’m having to get up early to prepare frosting that otherwise would’ve evaporated by afternoon, so it has to be made the day of..

—from “6 A.M. is Too Early to Move,” a screenplay about people who choose only to eat tropical fruit. Ca May, 1998.

Pie face, interlude

…Hey, man, just wanted you to know… that we’re, uh, you know, having a meeting tonight at the church at 6:30. It’s gonna, gonna, be a spiffy little time, bub-bub-bubu…you know?

–radio advertisement featuring famous 1950s singer/ songwriter Bob “the Bebop” Taft-Elliot, ca 1980, Onomatopoeia Morning Studios, Inc.

Hot Cross, interlude

…Hot Cross carbohydrates are we, made with flour and living yeast. Go on and try us, we’re sweeter than most.

…Hot bread made from sweet roll dough. We’re just two of a kind, I’ve got the brains, he’s got the brawn…

— from Hot Cross Bread Forever!the Musical, songs written and composed by Arugula Jackson-Pierce, New York, NY, 1988.

Witha Fishes, interlude

…You did a great job. I mean, would you look at that. It’s beautiful. …But it isn’t the outward appearance I’m talking about. For the sake of this instance, beauty really is on the inside….

–Recorded speech from crime boss Bill “The Confection” Tetrazzini, in response to success in hiding colored coconut candy filling inside chocolate candy coating. Ca

Mystery Fish, interlude

…We take desiccated coconut, dry fondant, coconut flavoring, some water, and mix it all together.

…Now get this: we then divide the coconut-fondant mixture into three separate bowels and take food coloring and color each a different color.

…Then we hide the colored coconut filling inside chocolate candy coating in these here fish molds.

…It’s a solid plan. They’ll never know what color the coconut is without taking a bite.

–from a secret recording of known con artist chefs, who make their living by making their victims guess the color of coconut inside candy fish. Ca 2008.